Plastic plates and cupcakes.

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keepmywhiskeyneat:

TRUE STORY
One morning, I was awakened by a knock at the door. I rolled out of bed, threw a blanket over my shoulder because it was cold, and made my way to the front of the house. I opened the door and a very nice Mormon lady handed me a pamphlet and launched in to a well-rehearsed spiel about accepting jesus in to my life when she stopped mid sentence and gave me a peculiar look. I used this pause in her speech to politely decline her offer and wish her a pleasant morning. It wasn’t until I looked at what she handed me that I understood why I stopped her in her tracks and then proceeded to laugh for the next half hour by myself.

keepmywhiskeyneat:

TRUE STORY

One morning, I was awakened by a knock at the door. I rolled out of bed, threw a blanket over my shoulder because it was cold, and made my way to the front of the house. I opened the door and a very nice Mormon lady handed me a pamphlet and launched in to a well-rehearsed spiel about accepting jesus in to my life when she stopped mid sentence and gave me a peculiar look. I used this pause in her speech to politely decline her offer and wish her a pleasant morning. It wasn’t until I looked at what she handed me that I understood why I stopped her in her tracks and then proceeded to laugh for the next half hour by myself.

Avengers + iconic lines

(Source: markoruffalo)

dewitts:

sodomywithsaddam:

okayyy can everybody stop talking shit about ppl who give their dogs and cats all-vegan diets, i fed my cat all raw vegan food since he was a kitten and he lived a very happy four years :)

image

cameo-of-vatican:

 love this for so many reasons #thor probably just found out that bruce turns into the hulk #and he literally met bruce hours ago #and everyone else who has known bruce just sees him as the hulk #but thor sees him as bruce banner #not the monster #he knows bruce somewhere in there#that the hulk isn’t just a mindless beast #and to make this even more feelsy#this is just like how he treats loki #everyone else sees loki as a psychotic menace #and thor is the only one who tries to reason with him instead of just attacking #this is why i hate it when people say thor is just all muscle and looks #he is so much more #he’s the only one who’s given the ‘monsters’ a chance to redeem themselves #and to me #thats one of the most heroic things someone can ever do

(Source: iamnevertheone)

mauridianhallow:

lambishwolf:

toptumbles:

This is called humanity


I have nothing to say on this, these people are the pinnacle of human compassion, and that is all there is to it.

mauridianhallow:

lambishwolf:

toptumbles:

This is called humanity

I have nothing to say on this, these people are the pinnacle of human compassion, and that is all there is to it.

(Source: toptumbles)

spoopyvegan:

clannyphantom:

lets be real guys if theres ever a zombie apocalypse do you even know how many white girls are gonna try and find a zombie boyfriend like in Warm Bodies

probably literally none holy shit did you really think adding “white” in front of that would really mask that you literally just said “girls are so desperate for a boyfriend they’ll try to fuck half-decomposed, ravenous, CORPSES” wtf even is that

mainstreetinternet:

The science witch trials

warbird27:

meshinator:

AIR FORCE HUA

ALL PILOTS EVER, IN A NUTSHELL

warbird27:

meshinator:

AIR FORCE HUA

ALL PILOTS EVER, IN A NUTSHELL

iamrebornthruhim:

Is is one of those episodes that was so important to the show. Not because it was major plot device but because it was an episode that, for the most part, was random yet hit every viewer right in the heart.

Why did no one remember her?

Does this episode show what humans are capable of or does this show a side of the doctor never witnessed before?

(Source: danny-pink)

etceteraface:

thewaywardqueen:

metaphoricalanchor:

i want to write the kind of short stories you read in english class that are on this weird level of surrealism that they still haunt you years down the road

in year 10 i wrote a story and when i got it back my teacher told me he couldnt sleep properly after reading it

please publish that story

digivolvin:

man every time i rewatch captain america i’m like. so inspired by dr. erskine. what a dude. bleeding out in steve rogers’ arms and his final act before dying is to go in for a last second boob touch. like, the dude saw his window of opportunity closing and he snatched it. not gonna see pecs like those in a shirt that tight in the afterlife. gotta make every minute on earth count.

tojothethief:

Just bull things. 

tojothethief:

Just bull things. 

buzzfeed:

*deep sigh of contentment*

mr-egbutt:

moc-tod-ffuts-modnar:

faelan01:

mapsontheweb:

Map of European leaders.

this is highly disturbing


I like this trend. I hereby decree that all maps be replaced with this highly intuitive system.

mr-egbutt:

moc-tod-ffuts-modnar:

faelan01:

mapsontheweb:

Map of European leaders.

this is highly disturbing

image

I like this trend. I hereby decree that all maps be replaced with this highly intuitive system.

cassowarykisses:

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

peter parker’s job is literally selling his selfies to the daily bugle

he should sell them a bunch of his phone selfies all like “oh haha spiderman stole my phone”